Murky Edge

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  • The murky edge of time

    Could time be circular? Is the linear notion of time the right one? Many indigenous cultures seemed to have some notion of a circular or at least highly rhythmical time pattern, in ways that may be hard for our Western minds to fathom.

    Apparently the strict idea of a linear time began with Jewish scholars, and of course since the ‘scientific’ paradigm has set in we are all led to believe time is very much a straight line. Apart from the sci-fi films where it can get a little jumpy at times.

    Yet anyone who has an even passing interest in Einstein will know that he and all the other modern physicists believe time isn’t very straight. It’s intimately connected with space – wrapped up together as spacetime. It doesn’t behave like a normal straightforward clock. It can speed up or slow down depending on how fast you are moving, and it can quite possibly move backwards. In fact I think they’ve even observed this in the Haldron Accelerator thingo. For a little example, my friend Ruben tells me in a black hole that they kind of swap roles – time becomes space and space time. I’ll have to get him to explain that again some day.

    Anyway, I often think back to a childhood experience… As a high school student walking up the big hill to our house at the end of a day, lugging all the text books which I hadn’t read. I’d gaze longingly at the top of the hill and wish I could be magically transported up the top. As I plodded along thinking this thought, I’d inevitably find that my dream had come true – I was suddenly at the top, the bottom now a distant memory. I had somehow warped time, or at least made it a little jumpy in my mind.

    When I think back now, I realise in some way I am still at the bottom of the hill, looking up longingly to the top. I don’t mean metaphorically, I mean I am actually there. I am also in my death bed, looking back at the life I have lived. I am also peering out from the cot at the blurry colourful world in front of me. It’s happening simultaneously, in the past, in the future, in an inevitable, circular way.

    I’ve read other stuff about time being circular based on seasons, years, days, life-cycles… But I think there is something more universal than that. My human mind can only glimpse at it.

  • Autism spectrum antibiotics and germs

    Autism has always fascinated me. From the time I worked as a carer for people with disabilities, to reading the remarkable Curious incident of the dog in the night-time to watching the beautiful, harrowing, raw Aussie film about family life with a severely autistic brother – The Black Balloon.

    Now they are calling it the fastest-growing developmental disorder in the industrialized world, having increased by over 600 percent in the last 20 years.

    I’ve wondered – do people with autism have a slightly ‘less than human’ existence? With a common aversion to touch, a difficulty with intimacy and showing or processing human emotions..? Or do they have a heightened sense of humanness that is just too much to bear? A hypersensitivity to the ‘human’ perceptions that needs to be turned down in volume if it can be absorbed without a wild reaction.

    Autism and aspergers help us to ponder the definition of humanness. Kathy Hoopman’s book – All Cats Have Aspergers is a playful analysis of the connection between feline and asperger characteristics. Fun, but with a serious bent too…

    With my love of spectrums of the human ‘condition’, I love that it is called an ‘autistic spectrum’, and I love the fact that in some ways we are all on this autistic spectrum. Perhaps all cats have aspergers, and perhaps all of us have it too!

     

  • Without colour or shape

    It is there that true being dwells, without colour or shape, that cannot be touched; reason alone, the soul’s pilot, can behold it, and all true knowledge is knowledge thereof.

  • The original ark

    Earth, the original ark, does not move.

  • Creativity

    All creativity is an elaboration of a profound creativity already underway at the most immediate level of sensory perception

  • I think therefore I am

    ‘I think therefore I am’ has always struck me as a very odd starting point for a philosopher. My alternative has always been: ‘I have a body so I am’. But perhaps using Gendlin’s ideas it would be something more like:

    ‘I have a strong ‘felt sense’ that I have a body… But I only have a very vague idea of what this really means.’

    Or…

    ‘I am fairly sure there is a reality – a real world/universe and other people out there, however my body and mind are imperfect/imprecise instruments for examining this reality… So what best place to start? Hmmm. Let’s start by letting the mind examine the body in a deeper way… And I don’t really have the words for this yet…’

  • An edge or a continuum?

    I’ve always liked the idea of using a continuum or a spectrum when looking at human characteristics. Extravert or intravert? Strong or weak? Feminine or masculine? Gay or straight? Scorpio or Taurus? We love categorising people because it helps us to understand people better (at least that’s what we imagine). But when you get down to it, most of us belong somewhere along the spectrum rather at one polar end or the other.

    Studying psychology, I was fascinated by the (often arbitrary) edges assigned to ‘conditions’. Score 10 or above on the Edinburgh Postnatal Depressive Scale and you should ‘see a health professional’. Score under 10 and you are fine, apparently.

    I just did the test and scored a 10. So I went back and did it again, perhaps ‘faking good’ for a few of the answers, and scored an 8. Phew! No problems! So do I have ‘postnatal depression’? The answer, clearly to me now than ever, is that I lie within the murky edge.

    The same is even more true for medicine. I had my cholesterol measured and it was just under the danger level. The doctor’s response? Oh, you’re fine… Just keep checking it regularly. Instead of… Hang on a sec, you are right on the edge there. Treat yourself as though you have high cholesterol for a few months/years and see if you can reduce it away from the danger zone. Surely that would have been a more sensible approach (which is what I’ve been doing since).

    But measuring things can be very useful, so how do we balance our need to categorise things with the looseness and murkiness of the human condition? I certainly don’t know the answer to that question.

    Myself, I’ll simply try to be more content to live within the murky edge of things.

  • Living the ‘don’t know’

    Linda Heuman writes: “For most of us, don’t-know is a place of get-me-out-of-here-quick. As a writer, sitting down to a blank page makes me instantly want to wash dishes, dust under beds, or finally sew those buttons on a coat I haven’t worn in years. But Eugene Gendlin doesn’t see don’t-know as the Bermuda Triangle of the psyche; to him it is just unexplored frontier, seas as yet uncharted—but friendly—that we can learn to navigate.”

    Learning to better access the ‘don’t know’, explore the ‘don’t know’ with as few preconceptions as possible, then maybe learn to actually live better in the ‘don’t know’..?

  • Gendlin’s murky edge

    You have to love these poorly-produced, horribly subtitled videos of Gene Gendlin, looking and sounding murky. He is the guru of all things murky though. And it was of these videos that instantly had me hooked into murky living (thanks RM!)

     

  • Six steps

    This info has been taken from focusing.org please have a look to find out more.

    So here are the focusing instructions in brief form, manual style. If you want to try them out, do so easily, gently. If you find difficulty in one step or another, don’t push too hard, just move on to the next one. You can always come back.

    Clearing a space

    What I will ask you to do will be silent, just to yourself. Take a moment just to relax . . . All right – now, inside you, I would like you to pay attention inwardly, in your body, perhaps in your stomach or chest. Now see what comes therewhen you ask, “How is my life going? What is the main thing for me right now?” Sense within your body. Let the answers come slowly from this sensing. When some concern comes, DO NOT GO INSIDE IT. Stand back, say “Yes, that’s there. I can feel that, there.” Let there be a little space between you and that. Then ask what else you feel. Wait again, and sense. Usually there are several things.

    Felt Sense

    From among what came, select one personal problem to focus on. DO NOT GO INSIDE IT. Stand back from it. Of course, there are many parts to that one thing you are thinking about – too many to think of each one alone. But you can feel all of these things together. Pay attention there where you usually feel things, and in there you can get a sense of what all of the problem feels like. Let yourself feel the unclear sense of all of that.

    Handle

    What is the quality of this unclear felt sense? Let a word, a phrase, or an image come up from the felt sense itself. It might be a quality-word, like tight, sticky, scary, stuck, heavy, jumpy or a phrase, or an image. Stay with the quality of the felt sense till something fits it just right.

    Resonating

    Go back and forth between the felt sense and the word (phrase, or image). Check how they resonate with each other. See if there is a little bodily signal that lets you know there is a fit. To do it, you have to have the felt sense there again, as well as the word. Let the felt sense change, if it does, and also the word or picture, until they feel just right in capturing the quality of the felt sense.

    Asking

    Now ask: what is it, about this whole problem, that makes this quality (which you have just named or pictured)? Make sure the quality is sensed again, freshly, vividly (not just remembered from before). When it is here again, tap it, touch it, be with it, asking, “What makes the whole problem so ______?” Or you ask, “What is in this sense?”

    If you get a quick answer without a shift in the felt sense, just let that kind of answer go by. Return your attention to your body and freshly find the felt sense again. Then ask it again.

    Be with the felt sense till something comes along with a shift, a slight “give” or release.

    Receiving

    Receive whatever comes with a shift in a friendly way. Stay with it a while, even if it is only a slight release. Whatever comes, this is only one shift; there will be others. You will probably continue after a little while, but stay here for a few moments.

    IF DURING THESE INSTRUCTIONS SOMEWHERE YOU HAVE SPENT A LITTLE WHILE SENSING AND TOUCHING AN UNCLEAR HOLISTIC BODY SENSE OF THIS PROBLEM, THEN YOU HAVE FOCUSED. It doesn’t matter whether the body-shift came or not. It comes on its own. We don’t control that.

    Not Following Instructions

    Isn’t it wrong to publish instructions for inward personal process?

    One danger with a set of instructions is that people might use them to close off other ways. Anything human involves more than one method. Please notice, we don’t say that this method is all you need or might find valuable. Had we said that, we hope you would have thought us stupid.

    Anything you learn here can go well with anything else that you may find helpful. If there seems to be a contradiction, go easy. Let your own steps find the way to reconcile the contradiction.

    There are other reasons one might not like specifics, such as these steps. Instructions may seem to diminish mystery and openness, although that is not so.

    Also, written instructions cannot avoid misunderstandings. No formula fits every person. Anyway, one must find one’s own path.

    These problems occur with all types of knowledge about humans.

    Adopt a “split-level” approach to all instructions: On the one hand follow the instructions exactly, so that you can discover the experiences to which they point. On the other hand be sensitive to yourself and your own body. Assume that only sound expansive experiences are worth having. The moment doing it feels wrong in your body, stop following the instruction, and back up slightly. Stay there with your attention until you can sense exactly what is going wrong.

    These are very exact instructions for how not to follow instructions!

     

    This info has been taken from focusing.org please have a look to find out more.